Back To Reality!

Hi! It’s been a while since I last posted, mainly because I have been too busy enjoying myself! In the past month Andy and myself have been down to London to watch the recording of the Alan Carr Chatty Man Christmas Special (It was great!), spent 10 days in the Midlands with our families over Christmas, spent a night in Birmingham, and have just returned from 4 nights in Cornwall!! Being so busy has really helped keep my mind occupied and has certainly helped with the awful weather we are having to endure! However, it’s now back to reality with a bump!! Next week I have a CT scan booked and, after careful consideration I have decided to go ahead with it. Is it any surprise then, that all I want to do now is book another holiday!

I have always hated returning from holidays, even if I am really happy with where I am living. I have always found reality quite difficult, even though my reality is a good deal better than a lot of other peoples. I am very grateful for my wonderful family, that we have a lovely home to live in and enough money to be able to enjoy ourselves, but I can’t help getting a sinking feeling when I step through the front door after a lovely time away.

Our recent stay in Cornwall was one of the best breaks we have ever had. We stayed in a detached lodge which was very luxurious (we couldn’t get the kids out of the jacuzzi bath!), and although the park did not have many amenities, it had a warm swimming pool which the kids went in every day. We have previously been to the park and whilst we were there previously Boots taught himself to swim! That was partly the reason we went back, as we know how much the children love the pool. Again, they were swimming away happily each day. We managed to get them out of the pool,( and bath) to get a day in Newquay. It is not my favourite town, especially in Winter, but the sun actually came out on the day we went there and so we managed to get a walk on the beach.

So, back to reality and a few difficult and worrying weeks ahead, waiting for my scan results to come back. I am trying not to get in too much of a state, as there really is no point, but most of the time I can put my diagnosis to the back of my mind. A scan automatically puts it right at the forefront. I have been taking my supplements and LDN, and have stuck to my diet (well, most of the time!), and so I am feeling hopeful. I also have other things I can put into place should the result not be what I am hoping for, so I know that I need to stay relaxed and not let my mind get carried away. I am going to practice mindfulness more and make sure that I do my meditation every day, and also try to get out and about (weather permitting!)

I am aware that it is also a difficult time of year generally, mid Winter and torrential rain every day! I, like many others, also get quite a bad case of the post-Christmas blues. It is the Winter time that I find the most difficult, and hate wishing my life away waiting for Spring. At least I have Elena and Boots to keep me busy. If it wasn’t for them, I don’t know how I would be coping. Our holiday was extra special as we didn’t take a laptop, so we spent quality time with them without them constantly asking for computer time! It is because of this that we have decided to limit their computer time even more now that we are back to make sure we do things as a family on a daily basis. It may take a while for them to accept this, but I know they will adjust and appreciate playing more games with us and hopefully going out for more walks.

Right, I suppose I had better go and un-pack, have a little cry, then get on with life! Wish me luck….!





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